Innoncence
by Lemonly
Summary: Hermione reflects on her relationship with Viktor.  Song by Sarah Buxton


_It's the first time that I've been here  
Since I was here with him  
I remember all the wild flowers  
Waving in the wind  
Life was an undiscovered river  
I was jumping in  
Head first_

Hermione walked through the forbidden forest, arriving at her destination a little under ten minutes later. This was their spot. She hadn't been here since her fourth year, when she brought him to this spot. She could remember it clearly. It was spring and the wild flowers where all over the place. Hermione sat down on the rock facing the lake. She remembered how much she loved this place, that's why she brought him here. It was on the lake, but you still had to walk through the forest to get here. Not even his little fan girls were willing to walk through the seemingly perpetually dark forest. She brought him here to let him in on a part of her life. She had fallen for him fast. God, she couldn't believe it was only three years ago. __

It was sink or swim, do or die  
Sneaking out on summer nights  
Stealing wine from my Pa  
The thrill of not getting caught  
And now and then I miss those days  
But coming back to this place  
I realize it ain't him I miss  
It's that young girl, wide-eyed, first love  
One time innocence  
Yeah 

She remembered sneaking out of her house and meeting him at the park down the street. He would apparate there almost every night. After a month of sneaking out, she began to sneak bottles of her father's wine out of the wine cellar. She shocked herself by never getting caught. Being Harry Potter's best friend and spending four years sneaking off to various places while at school had finally paid off. She moved thanking him to the back of her mind. She missed those days on occasion, usually after being torn down by the Slytherin girls for not looking like a goddess, not being beautiful. When that happened, her friends made sincere attempts to cheer her up. Ron always said that Pansy Parkinson and Millicent Bulstrode had no right to comment on anyone's appearance. Harry, who was her boyfriend of two years, would tell her that he always thought she was beautiful; more so than any goddess he could think of. Lavender and Parvati would remind her that Viktor Krum had thought her gorgeous and had dated her for six months. That always caused her to get lost in her thoughts, in the world of her memories. Last year, she realized that she didn't really miss him, it was more she missed what she gave him. She had told Harry about what exactly happened between her and Viktor. He took it better than she thought. He never pushed her into doing anything she didn't want. He was a perfect gentleman to her. And she knew he would be the same way even if she hadn't told him about Viktor, that why she agreed to marry him last weekend.__

We ran off to the corn field  
Just outside the county fair  
There were butterflies in my stomach  
And fireflies in the air  
He tried hard not to show it  
Oh, but he was just as scared  
as me 

A couple weeks before Hermione was to go to Headquarters, Hermione had gone with Viktor to visit some of his family members in the States. She remembered how excited she had been, having always wanting to America. Victor's uncle lived on a farm in Wisconsin and took them to the county fair with him and his family. They managed to sneak away from everyone, again Hermione found herself thanking Harry, and into the corn field so they could be with just each other. She found herself growing nervous when she realized just how much privacy they had. As she watched the fireflies trying to ignore her own butterflies, she chanced a glance at Viktor and was relieved when she saw he looked as nervous as she felt. He told her that he loved her and she had lit up.__

And it was sink or swim, do or die  
Sneaking out on summer nights  
Stealing wine from my Pa  
The thrill of not getting caught  
And now and then I miss those days  
But coming back to this place  
I realize it ain't him I miss  
It's that young girl, wide-eyed, first love  
One time innocence  
Yeah  


Sitting at the spot where she and Viktor had met almost all through her fourth year, brought back so many memories, memories that made her miss him, or the piece of her he would always have, that no one else could ever have. That summer was one of the best she had ever had, it topped going to the Burrow and having to deal with Ron following her around like a puppy. But at the same time, it was one of the worst. It caused her to miss what she could never take back or tell anyone, besides Harry of course, about. I mean, how would the wizarding world react to Hermione Ganger, war heroine, best friend of Harry Potter, fiancée of Harry Potter, brightest witch of her age, etc., had lost her virginity to Viktor Krum in a corn field in rural Wisconsin? She didn't regret it then, but looking back, she really wished she had thought it through more.

_And coming here has made me come to this  
The one thing I can't get back  
Is the one thing I miss  
Yeah _

She didn't regret it; she just wished that she thought more about it, waited for a more romantic time and place. After all, losing your innocence in a corn field while visiting your boyfriend's family isn't really romantic. She did miss her innocence, but only because she knew Viktor would always have that; that it was the one thing she wished more than anything she could give to Harry but couldn't. It made her feel guilty. __

And it was breaking rules, flying blind  
What you see through younger eyes  
It wasn't what I thought it was  
Man, I swore he was the one  
And now and then I miss those days  
But coming back to this place  
I realize it ain't him I miss  
It's that young girl, wide-eyed, first love  
One time innocence  
Yeah  
It's that young girl, wide-eyed, first love  
One time innocence  


That summer was part of why it was so easy for her to break the rules without fighting so much in her fifth year. She broke almost every single one of her parents' rules that summer. The best part was she never stopped to think of the consequences, luckily, she never got caught. In her fifteen year old eyes, Viktor was Prince Charming. She thought he was the one for her. He thought she was beautiful, funny, smart, even when she didn't try. But then her Prince Charming turned out to be a douche, breaking up with her for a blonde Quidditch groupie. Sure, there were days when she missed being 15 and head-over-heels in love with the 18 year old Quidditch star. But if he had never dumped her, she wouldn't be with Harry now, and she wouldn't be as happy as she was now. She really didn't miss him that much.

"Mione?" Harry asked, walking toward her and folding up his invisibility cloak.

"I'm okay, Harry." Hermione responded, answering his unspoken question with her eyes never leaving the lake.

"What's on your mind?" Harry asked, sitting down next to her on the rock.

"Just thinking about the last time I was at this spot and who it was with." Hermione replied, knowing that Harry didn't mind her thinking about Viktor.

"Do you want to think aloud to someone?"

"Harry, I love you, so much." Hermione said, turning to look at him.

"I love you too, Mione." Harry said, knowing that she truly meant it. It was something she always said to him whenever he caught her thinking about Viktor.

"And I can't wait to be the next Mrs. Potter."

"I can't wait either."

"And, Harry, I'm sorry."

"You don't have anything to be sorry about. I know you still think about him and I'm okay with that. I know how much a first love means and I know how much he hurt you."

"Thank you for understanding, Harry."

"I'll always understand, Mione."

"I know Harry."

Hermione smiled contently at him and kissed him lightly.

"I love you more than words can say." she whispered.

"I love you more than that." Harry responded sincerely.

She giggled and kissed him again. Yeah, she missed the only part of her she couldn't give to Harry. But miss Viktor? Why would she miss a gorilla of a man when she had her soul mate right in front of her?

_Yeah, it's that innocence  
Mmm, mmm_


End file.
